I used to know how to count 1 up to 10 in Somalian.
Thanks to the bus ride with AIC people :)


This one is for you Nida

We have lot of things in common, besides our name ( Fida Nida).
We have common thoughts, well maybe it's because we're at the same phase; adolescence. I don't know. She's good in words and describing things. Though we seperated by ocean, she knows what I think, how I feel, and she knows how to explain it in words.

I miss her. Truck loads.

Dedicated to Nida since she's the best commentor on my blog (haha). Tania and Ala, just wait, I'll be making one for you too.


What is it?

Why do I always regret things that happened to me?
Why do I always insist that I'm not in the right place?
Why do I always wanna be like them?
Why do I always wanna have something I know I can't have?

and I won't stop asking.


And random is my middle name

To be loved, to be loved
What more could you ask for?
To be loved, to be loved
Everyone wants to be loved
To be loved
What more could you ask for?
To be loved, to be loved

About a girl - The Academy Is...

I think knowing that you are loved is one of the greatest feeling in the world,
And being in love is the second greatest feeling, haha. Wth? Do you get what I mean?

No, I'm not in love. Don't worry.


Another soundtrack

Hal yang menyenangkan hati banyak sekali
bahkan kalau kita bermimpi

(Ost. Chibi Marukochan)

I feel the changes in myself, good and bad,
for one year and six months.
I feel different.

I become more 'laid-down' type of person.
Did I spell it right?

Sigh, I don't want 2009 to end.



I think I've chosen the wrong major.
I'm a science type of person. But I chose Management.
I should chose Economics of Development which is more 'science'.
Oh wells, they're both Economics anyway.


And it's on.

Found out senior is different than what I thought.

So, who the hell is senior?


30th post

Congratulation for making it!


I hope you are happy!
Well, of course you are. So obvious.


Because I am me

I really wish someone would ask me cliche questions,
Like, how I feel, what am I doing, how am I going.
Or just make sure if I'm alright

through cellphone.

Cliche, I know.
But you don't know how special it feels.
I wanna be like everybody else.


And I learnt something

That beautiful face is not always equal to beautiful behaviour.


And, What kinda shape are you?

I'm a square. Very fixed.
and I need to transform.

Erm, I'm a denial too. Wait!
That isn't a shape!
Oh wells, that's me anyway.


And then she fell

out of love.
Oh yes, people do fall out of love.


And We wish for something

Let's experience new things,
Go to new places,
Meet new people,
Be a brand new person.

I wish.


17.16 PM

I got this info from the news.
Earthquake in Padang happened at 17.16 PM
and let's take a look what Quran says,

"And when We decide to destroy a town (population), We (first) send a definite order (to obey Allah and be righteous) to those among them (or We (first) increase in number those of its population) who are given the good things of this life. Then, they transgress therein, and thus the word (of torment) is justified against it (them). Then We destroy it with complete destruction. "

(Q.S Al- Isra (17) verse 16)

I've been posting verses in my last 2 posts.
Ar-Rahman is my current favorite surah.
and this one? I just want to share something.


And so He asks

"Then which of the Blessings of your Lord will you both (jinns and men) deny?"

(Ar- Rahman, Q.S 55: 13)


And we're both in silence

I am waiting for my next class.
and I saw you struggling to get
on to the last bus to campus.
Erm, you were white.


We make sins

We do. I just did.
I don't know how God is going to punish me.
Maybe He is preparing for the severe punishment.

I am not looking forward to go to Indralaya.
I hate that place.
Full of stuck ups.

Shit, I just made sins.


Where I stood

(title: Missy Higgins)

Darlings, we are so much more than meets the eyes.
Try not to judge people on th first meet,
I know it's very hard.


I am back to normal

and I wish we coincidentally go to the same supermarket, we talk for moment and we become great friends.
No wait, we've talked!
That's good, should be remember my name then. But I act like a jerk.
No that's not good.

Sigh. It could've been beautiful.

Oh seniorr.


Quadriple shts.

Why do I have to understand how people feel when they can't even understand mine?


I feel like eating my lecturer alive, grr.
Screw you people.


In search of myself

Popularity is every teenge girl's problem.

And I am lost,
It's very blur, I can't see anything
I rely on my senses and feelings.
All I know, I have to survive.


Speed of Sound

(title: Coldplay)

And if I understand how everybody feels,
I will never hurt them deliberately,
You will never hurt us deliberately,
We will never hurt anyone,
But that's out of human behaviour

I think.


And I say

Success is when you achieve what you want in life.
And most people doesn't know what you want.
So, when they see you as a product of failure.
Proof them, that this is only the beginning of your success.


31 August 2008- 31 August 2009
It's been a year since I became a college student, time does fly fast.

To be grateful for what you have is easier than complaining what you don't have.


A runaway

cousin- brother- me

That picture taken in Pantai Panjang, Bengkulu, August 2008.
Man, I miss having a holiday.
I want fresh air, and some greens and blues.
My holiday only revolves around family and friends, but mostly families. If it's not picking my sister from her school then it's babysitting my youngest sister. They're okay jobs. But when you do it all the time, you brain twists. Very monotone.


Rythm of my heart: flat.


I dream big

Have you ever feel the urge of having something you can not have?
You tell yourself that it isn't worth it, but you still wanna have it.
You tell yourself that there are other things better than 'it' but still, doesn't work.
What kinda feel is that?
How do you overcome it?


Another unimportant post during holiday

boredom is my best friend.


The art of letting go.
Sincere, that's all you need. Feel and enjoy it.
It doesn't hurt that much.


High and dry

So much wants that I don't know which one I want the most.
I want all of them, now!

As for the title, my cousin just sung radiohead's song "High and Dry"



I miss having a crush on someone
do you think I'm normal?

I stop crushing on people. Why? because it's like I'm the one that's running after them. And that's very tiring. Right now I feel so light, so plain. I don't have to be nervous when I meet certain person, I don't have to feel the rush of excitement when I see certain someone. But I miss having those feelings.




Nick Gant: You must have had yourself wiped. Erased memories make it harder for Division to track you
Kira Hudson: Not the ones of you.

very sweet :")


Not knowing what comes next

some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. delicious ambiguity. - gilda radner

I don't who she is, but totally agree with what she thought. hmm


There'll be no short semester or short course? whatever you call it. I don't know where to go, what to do. Well, actually friend of mine offered me a job at this shopping center (i tell you when I'm accepted) but we have to make proposals. I'll try to work there, just wanna grab the opportunity for these 3 months.

So, what are you guys doing for this holiday?